HIKING

​Dear 28-year-old Jessie,

Waterfalls are so romantic--Uh, no.

​Did you know you have to hike for them? I mean, by the time you actually get to find one, you been hiking for about two hours, you’re sweating bullets, you obviously did not think to pack a hair brush, and last but not least… because your hubby doesn’t want you to dehydrate he keeps encouraging you to drink water ALL THE TIME, so now, you finally arrived at the waterfall and instead of enjoying the sight, you can’t even bare to focus because YOUR BLADDER IS ABOUT TO BURST!!!

I look around for Hubby wondering if I’m the only one trying to keep my legs crossed--Wait. Where did he go? 

I finally spot him in a corner, looking up at a tree, deep in thought, scratching his chin. He looks to be bird-watching, but then I notice he’s standing discreetly behind some high bushes—Oh, Traitor!!! Bird-watching, my hiney! He's peeing!!

What about me?

I scan around at other bushes nearby. Ok… I can do this. 

Yeah, right! Like I’m gonna do that!

Hubby walks back with a satisfied grin. “Ready?”

“Don’t talk to me.” I say, turning away, fighting the urge to slap him.

“What’s wrong?”

I lean closer and whisper in a hushed tone. “I have to pee!”

“So, if you can’t pee, I shouldn’t either?”

“Exactly!” I stomp ahead, trying hard to ignore his laughter behind me. What’s worst, I’m surrounded by the sound of trickling water, and to top it all off…a thunder roars in the distance.

Great. Just. Great.
 


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Dear Jessie,

Have fun hiking today! =)